Friday, July 5, 2013

The Oracle

I barely have the energy to dictate this post, as I frolicked to the point of exhaustion yesterday.  Today was terribly hot, and then I was left home alone and unfed while Leah went gallavanting off to the pub!  I am so weak I should certainly be resting on a cushion......

but I can't disappoint, and there is much to say.
We traveled all the way to Fiamma's for Independence Day.  (That's independence from England.  A very powerful planet of old, full of dog-lovers and connected to Scotland.  I am of course Scottish.  So I don't really understand why we had to be independent, but Leah says independence is a good thing.  She also says that I am willfully independent. I am not sure what the alternative is....Can one be independent any other way?)
Fiamma's home houses the Oracle of Joy.  J.J. is an aged Dachsund.  He is blind and deaf.  And I am quite certain he is the happiest dog living.  His tail wags with a purity of spirit akin to the Buddha.  He is always at peace.  I tend toward melancholy, so myself I view the Oracle as one of my greatest mentors. He greeted us warmly even dragging his decrepit self out of his bed and into the heat to partake in the joy of the day.  He lives on 20 beautiful mostly wooded acres in Chappaqua NY.  There's a swimming pool,  a tennis court, a garden (with excellent bushes for hunting and marking), and a beautiful stone deck perfect for cooling one's belly on hot sticky days.  The entire property is fenced and set back from the road, so Leah stopped worrying about Nessarose and I wandering into the road and turned us loose to frolic freely!!  ALL EVENING! 
So I set about on the very important business of examining the grounds and the house thoroughly,  so as to inspect for any dangers ( dragons). First I peed on at least one tire of every car parked in the drive. Then I marked all the plants immediately adjacent to the house.  By then the humans had said their hellos and kissed and shaken hands, so we were invited into the house for a tour.  Of course we paid our respects to the Oracle immediately.  Leah shared cookies between us all and we had an excellent long sniff of his butt.  Fiamma gave Leah and Angus a tour of the entire house.  Nessarose of course ran ahead of them the whole way, always afraid she'll be shut behind a door. I know better and lingered behind to fully take in all the smells the Oracle and his disciples had left behind.  ( He has several disciples who live with him part time,  Max and Maya- two siberian huskies, Princess Charlotte, a lab mix rescued by Fiamma. And a new chihuahua I have not yet met.)
I carefully left a drop or two of pee in every room as a sign of utmost respect to the Oracle. He is a most gracious host.  Then the tour was over and we were off!
I marked the garden thoroughly, and the edge of the tennis court. I was careful to pace myself and visit the pool for drinking often( it's the biggest water bowl ever!) so as to keep lots of fluid on board. 20 acres is a lot of territory to cover!
Nessarose on the other hand went Ballistic.  She ran around like a lunatic and within the first 20 minutes her tongue was hot pink and hanging all the way out of her mouth, like a deranged hyena.  Once the humans started swimming in the pool she completely lost her mind.  She ran in circles round the outside of the pool chasing splashes of water, barking at the people, trying to herd them out of the pool...for approximately two hours.  She only fell into the pool twice, usually she's in and out numerous times as she misjudges where the edge is in her effort to herd the humans.  It was clear this morning that she had seriously outdone herself as she limped down the driveway to the barn office....no sophistication whatsoever....
Bubbles arrived with her human Morgan later in the evening.  If the Oracle is a Grand Master of Joy, then Bubbles is the rung below as a Mistress of Joy.  She is of course clever enough to have only joined in the pool mania briefly.  We had a good long roll in the grass together.
I was fed several hot dogs and the fatty bit of a steak no humans wanted to finish. Fiamma's boyfriend Joe is an excellent grillman.  The joy of the day so overwhelmed me that I allowed myself to be videotaped performing a trick for food. Normally I would not allow proof of the humiliating, demeaning ritual of dogs performing tricks for  food, but in the spirit of the Oracle and his aura of happiness I felt compelled, so I did an excellent bear dance and I am including it here.  I am man-dog enough to be okay with this.   I am NOT a performing monkey.  I am not.

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